Dr. Thomas Maples

I ran into this great article on attachment style and one’s compatibility within intimate relationships.

I wanted to share with you, as Alexandra brings astute attention to the psychological premise of attachment theory and its effect on our general capacity to relate with others. This is a much needed subject for study, as problems with intimate relationships seem to be mounting with the increase of time spent around non-relational forms of entertainment such as cell-phones, computers, and in general screen time.

“Sexual satisfaction for both the anxiously attached and the avoidant is constricted; the anxious partner is preoccupied with being loved, and the avoidant partner is determined to stay detached….The most satisfying and orgasmic sex, what I call ‘synchrony sex,‘ occurs when partners are securely attached A secure bond is characterized by emotional openness and responsiveness in the bedroom as well as out. That leads to better communication and engaged, focused attention, which in turn leads to greater arousal, pleasure, and satisfaction….Think about it. If you trust that your partner is there for you, then you can relax and let go without fear of embarrassment or rejection. Safety fosters a willingness to experiment, take risks, and be fully immersed in the sexual encounter. Sex becomes more spontaneous, passionate, and joyful.”

What Attachment Style Has To Say About The Way You Have Sex? —

For those who are new to attachment theory, it’s simple premise involves the capacity we have to attach to others. From a psychoanalytic perspective, we learn to attach to others from our early attachments during childhood (parent/child) relationships. These relationships in turn, affect the way we form and relate with people in future friendships and intimate relationships.

I Hope You Enjoyed.

Dr. Tom